Interview with Anya Kerstin

On Vaccination: Past, Present and Future.

Jan 06, 2024

During the Global Medical Crisis (GMC) I came across a small number of stories of parents who had raised unvaccinated children only to see them, as adults, get vaccinated (and injured).

As I came to terms with the whole rotten enterprise that is childhood vaccination, I also came to understand the very significant social and financial cost of raising unvaccinated children. Doctors that will not see you, family that will shame and reject you, friends that will look down on you and reject you, jobs you cannot get, two incomes you cannot maintain, I could keep going.

Unvaccinated children are the “most expensive” children to raise. It’s so much easier to just stick the needle in.

Early Realization and Decision-Making

What were your initial thoughts and feelings when you decided to research childhood vaccinations?

"The thought or voice came to me clearly: 'Look into childhood vaccinations.' It's important to note that this wasn't my first encounter with such intuitive guidance, yet I wasn't fully aware of it as my inner voice or intuition. I found myself unable to ignore it; without fear, doubt, worry, or hesitation, I simply heeded its direction.

Before this moment, I can't recall ever questioning the societal and medical norms about vaccinations. When the thought struck, I unhesitatingly agreed, saying to myself, 'Okay'. My recollection of how I ended up at a particular bookstore in Santa Monica is hazy. I was raised in Santa Monica and was living in Culver City with my then-husband at the time. It's possible that during a shopping trip to the Santa Monica mall with my daughter, who was about 10 months old, I stumbled upon The Phoenix Bookstore, a place I don't remember ever seeing or knowing about, and decided to walk in. What happened next in the bookstore is vivid in my memory.

I approached the counter, baby in tow, and inquired if the gentleman there could direct me to books on childhood vaccinations. My question was posed naturally, with no inkling that it might be considered unusual. The man, who turned out to be the owner, asked about my interest in the topic. He shared that he and his wife, parents to a son around my daughter's age, chose not to vaccinate their child. He mentioned his wife's involvement in a baby-mommy group that met regularly, though I'm uncertain if it was weekly or bi-monthly. The group, a supportive and private gathering for parents who decided against vaccinating their children, was open for me to join if I wished to learn more. He then guided me to the relevant section, and I left with at least three books, later extending my research to the library.

At my first group meeting the following week, I received a warm welcome. As we introduced ourselves, it was clear I was the only one still undecided about vaccinations. Despite this, the group embraced me in the subsequent months. I absorbed their stories, understanding each of their unique reasons for choosing not to vaccinate.

A particular memory from the second or third meeting stands out: the celebration of one woman's legal victory. Her ex-husband had sued for sole custody of their child, citing her refusal to vaccinate as evidence of unfit motherhood. Her win was not just a personal triumph but a precedent, a collective victory for the group.

At that time, I kept these developments to myself, aware of the contentious nature of the subject. I believe I mentioned my attendance at these meetings and my ongoing research to my husband, but it didn't seem to particularly concern him.

I pursued this research out of necessity, maintaining an open mind throughout, unattached to any specific outcome."

Can you describe the moment of "knowing beyond knowing" that led you to question vaccinations? How did this intuition manifest for you?

“The moment I experienced this deep, undeniable knowing was marked by a peaceful presence, a gentle, unobtrusive voice that transcended reason and guided me towards exploring this topic. This 'Knowing beyond Knowing' has become increasingly familiar to me over time. I've noticed that when I ignored this inner guidance, I faced greater struggles.

When my baby was around four months old, I sought help for what was diagnosed as postpartum depression. This led me to a therapist, with whom I worked for exactly eight years. I had undergone about two and a half years of therapy a decade earlier and thought I had addressed everything then. However, the birth of my child brought more issues to the surface. Interestingly, my therapist had a daughter six years older than mine, who she chose not to vaccinate. She was very private about this decision but eventually opened up to me, even mentioning her well-known pediatrician who made the same choice for his children but never publicly disclosed it.

I had been seeing this therapist for a couple of months when I started my vaccine research and was initially unaware of her stance on the matter. It took me some more time to muster the courage to share my research with her, fearing rejection. You can imagine my relief when she not only accepted my views but also shared her similar experiences openly and supportively. My inner strength and well-being grew, and I became less fearful of others' opinions and judgments, shedding many of the 'misperceptions of reality' I had carried up until that point in my life."

Research Journey

What resources did you first turn to for information on childhood vaccinations, and why did you choose them?

"I'm certain I still have some of these books stored away at a friend’s place in Birmingham, Alabama. I distinctly remember that these books were not about scare tactics. Several offered a true perspective on Jonas Salk towards the end of his career, particularly regarding his development of the polio vaccine. For instance, they highlighted his eventual view that the vaccine was unnecessary, arguing that improvements in hygiene, environmental conditions, and the natural process of healing eliminated the need for a polio vaccine. I won't delve into the specifics here, but for those earnestly seeking the truth, this uncensored research is readily accessible."

How did your visit to The Phoenix Bookstore in Santa Monica influence your views? Can you detail your experience there?

"I touched on this earlier, but what stood out to me the most about joining the group at the bookstore was their unconditional positive regard for my journey. They welcomed me without judgement or pressure to conform to their views. This experience of open-mindedness and acceptance was strikingly different from the more closed-minded interactions I've encountered elsewhere, especially in the current climate surrounding Covid. The adage 'a house divided falls' resonates deeply with me. In my quest for unity within myself, I've found that sometimes this means being at odds with others, including my own children and family, as has been my experience."

How did you balance the group's insights with your own thoughts and research?

"Throughout this entire journey, I remained open and guided by my own inner knowing. No one swayed me to make decisions that didn't resonate with me. In fact, there was a phase, a bit after the beginning and into the middle, where I found myself wrestling with the knowledge I was acquiring. I recall moments of internal conflict, wishing I didn't have to bear the responsibility of this decision. I distinctly remember the tears shed over feeling isolated with the heavy task of being my baby's voice.

Then, gradually, there came a definitive turning point.

I continued to do my best, constantly turning and tuning inwards. I would consider the external input – the suggestions, ideas, opinions – but then I would retreat into my own space, reflecting with myself and my baby. It was a process of consciously suspending belief in the external voices that I had been conditioned to trust, allowing myself to listen more closely to my own."

Family Dynamics and Social Pressure

What were the social pressures like when raising your children unvaccinated?

"I found it unsettling that I had to resort to half-truths when enrolling my children in public and private schools. I was compelled to sign the religious exemption form, which, for me, didn't encompass the entirety of my truth. However, my personal truth didn't align with the 'law of the land'. It seems there's little room for acceptance of an inner certainty, a Knowing Beyond Knowing, about what is best for oneself and those under one's care."

How did your family and friends react to your decision not to vaccinate your children?

"I refrained from discussing this topic with my family, as they already viewed me as unacceptably unconventional and somewhat 'out there'. Some family members didn't hesitate to express their unsolicited opinions, often laced with a sense of shame, but I made a conscious decision not to internalize their judgments. Yet, it was still painful at some level to be perceived as an outcast. I was even labelled 'The Devil' by some for not being a 'born-again Christian' and for following my own guidance, which they equated with devilish influence. We never broached the subject again, and as a result, our paths diverged.

This sense of isolation extended to the mommy/baby group that I had initially co-founded. I had never openly declared my decision against vaccinating; it was a topic I simply avoided. However, when my second child was born in 1995, a situation arose when he was about six months old. A group member, mother to a child of similar age, mentioned my son's upcoming six-month check-up and vaccinations. Upon my response of negation, the dynamics within the group shifted negatively, marking the start of a downward spiral in our interactions."

Here are the last details leading up to the decision…

"I had been researching and participating in the baby group at the bookstore for about a month, yet I was still uncertain about vaccinating my daughter. The night before her 12-month check-up, she developed a high fever. Despite a lingering fever the next day, I took her to the appointment. The doctor suggested it was time for her next vaccination, but I expressed my concerns about vaccinating a child recovering from a fever (I was at least certain about this). He agreed to postpone it until her 16-month check-up. Remarkably, the same scenario unfolded again — a high fever the night before her next appointment. I relayed my concerns, and he deferred the vaccinations again, this time planning to administer all three at her next visit. By then, I had firmly decided against vaccinations. When I informed the doctor, he warned me of being labeled an unfit mother. However, his attempt to intimidate me was futile; I was resolute, well-informed, and immune to such fearmongering.

At the same time, I was 38 weeks pregnant with my son. During an ultrasound, a 4 cm tumor/cyst was discovered on one of his organs. The doctor insisted on immediate surgery after birth. However, an inner voice warned me against it. As I left the clinic, the office manager discreetly approached me and handed me a business card for a homeopath. This homeopath, a U.S. resident originally from New Zealand, advised against both the surgery for my unborn child and vaccinations. Six months after my son’s birth in June 1995, the tumor had completely disappeared, baffling the doctors who had initially diagnosed him.

I found our new pediatrician, Dr. Paul Fleiss, through the unvaccinated group. He was incredibly supportive of my decisions for my children, never uttering a word of opposition. His approach was loving and supportive.

Through my journey, I met various professionals – including doctors, lawyers, homeopaths, practitioners of Chinese medicine, counselors, and laypeople – who chose not to vaccinate and kept their decisions private, fearing public backlash. The homeopath who helped my son feared deportation despite her legal residency. They regarded their choice as a personal matter, preferring to avoid potential negative consequences. As for me, I've never hidden my stance on not vaccinating. While I don't broadcast it unnecessarily, I've always been open and honest in discussions or when asked directly."

Awareness and Understanding of the Children

At what age and under what circumstances did your children become aware that they were unvaccinated?

"My children likely overheard discussions about school enrolments, forms, and conversations with their father, but I don't think they fully considered their unvaccinated status until 2020, when Covid became a global concern. Until then, they seemed to accept it as normal, perhaps viewing it as a decision I made for their highest good. I've openly shared with them my belief that the guidance I received to research vaccinations before my son was even conceived was a foresight, preparing us for his heightened sensitivities to things like food colouring, preservatives, and chemicals — sensitivities I shared but were not recognized during my childhood in the 60s and 70s. Now, I see this sensitivity as a superpower.

I firmly believe that vaccinating him, especially in his early years, could have been fatal or caused severe harm, given his allergies to the preservatives and chemicals in vaccines. It's not just my son; I've seen the adverse effects firsthand in children close to our family. A child the same age as my daughter and a cousin of my son's age both suffered neurological damage following their 4-month childhood vaccines.

As for any administrative issues related to their unvaccinated status, I handled all inquiries and requirements from schools and various activities, ensuring it was never a problem for them to face."

How did you approach this conversation with them?

"I have always been forthright and transparent, maintaining that much of the public is misinformed about vaccinations. I've stressed that the information is available for anyone who wishes to educate themselves, but I've observed that many are too apprehensive to take on such a decision-making role (and, believe me, I can relate). As a result, they often delegate this authority to doctors or other healthcare professionals. In raising my children, I've always encouraged them to question, think independently, and conduct their own research."

Experiences During Covid

How did the pandemic impact your and your children's views on vaccination?

"Right from the first mention of the Covid narrative, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that something was drastically wrong. I never believed what we were being told, not even for a nano second. It was so obvious to me that it was truly unimaginable that everyone didn’t see this as false information. There were so many times I wished I was wrong. I wanted to be wrong, but I couldn’t deny the Pure Voice speaking to me.

My children decided to get the vaccines, influenced by their partners. They told me outright that they did not want to hear any contrary information I might know. My daughter admitted to my face that she knew I believed something different, but she was too afraid and simply wanted to do what the government was telling her. They both became distant and turned on me. My daughter sat with me and said I was part of the problem, that if only I would stop being stubborn, the world could be okay and the pandemic would be over. My son labelled me a granola-crunching hippie. Despite my efforts to raise them to listen within, meditate, and question, in their eyes, I was just their crazy mom.

That's what fear does to people. It shuts down critical thinking. My daughter and her wife, both mathematicians and scientists, have been operating from their reptilian brains. This is exactly what the plan was all along: to dumb people down, to have them live in fear, listen to only mainstream outer news, and follow orders. I saw how proud they and many others were, mindlessly following the protocol, posting their vaccination photos on Instagram and Facebook, and pointing fingers at those who didn’t comply, just as they were told to."

What specific events or discussions led to their decision to get vaccinated?

"The mainstream news, with its tendency to shame, blame, and spread misinformation, played a significant role, and I believe the financial incentives offered made a considerable difference. Since May of 2020, when I was invited to leave California, I've driven across the country and witnessed the atrocious displays of those who succumbed to the bait, the blackmail, and so forth. The billboards I've seen are promoting these lies, vividly illustrating the extent of the misinformation campaign."

Was the decision to get vaccinated immediate, or did it involve a struggle or external pressure? Can you elaborate on this process?

"I don’t think my children struggled to follow the mainstream narrative. However, I do believe that both of them, like many others, were hearing subtle whispers, but the grip of fear was too strong. Both of their partners were astonished to learn that their mother (me) hadn't vaccinated them during their childhoods. I faced a lot of shame and blame because of this. I think they weren't informed within themselves to make their own informed decisions. We each have the freedom to choose, and until we 'know' from our own direct experience, it is simply hearsay. Do the work to know — or not!"

Parent-Child Relationship Dynamics During Covid

How did your relationship with your children evolve during the Covid pandemic, particularly in relation to the vaccination decisions?

"I was literally broken-hearted. The desire to curl up and die overwhelmed me. I was fearful for my children and the potential negative effects of the vaccines (they took all three). The pain of not having them in my life, especially during those years from July 2021 to May 2023, was excruciating.

During this time, I traveled alone, engaging in house-sitting, people-sitting, pet-sitting, and even hospice work, while deeply contemplating my life. With no concrete income and no fixed home, everything I've done since May of 2020 has been sustained by Love Offerings. This journey began when I left my position as Sr. Minister at a Unity Center in Tennessee in December 2017 to care for my mother in California.

Since the onset of Covid, I've been uninvited from family gatherings, speaking engagements as a Unity Minister, and friends' parties, all because I refused to follow protocols. I go where I am welcome and find peace in that. I've used all the pain and heartache for my personal growth, healing, and upliftment. No one can take anything away from me; no one can define who I am. I am that I am.

I have helped a couple of friends through Covid (interestingly, all the vaccinated people I know have contracted Covid multiple times), and through it all, I have remained free. I emerged stronger as I surrendered it all. My business is not my children's choices. I lovingly conceived them, provided a nurturing womb, and cared for them to the best of my ability. My love for them is unconditional, and I expect nothing in return. I simply love. I love no matter what, and I am free, no matter what."

Reflections on the Journey

Looking back, how do you feel about your decision and its impact on your children's lives?

"I understand that the best contribution I can make to anyone is to be my best SELF. To comprehend, beyond mere intellectual knowing, that I am good, that I am a liberated HU-MAN-BEING. In Sanskrit, 'Hu' signifies 'light', and 'man' in Middle English means 'person'. To me, HUMANBEING essentially translates to LIGHT-BEING. Yes, we are essentially photons of light, embodying and radiating light."

What lessons have you learned from this journey that you believe are important to share with others?

"Love naturally gravitates towards loving, and we are all constantly doing our best, based on our understanding and state of being at any given moment. No one has the authority to compel me to do anything against my will. When someone claims to 'know' what's 'right' for me, insisting on something like vaccination, it only solidifies my belief that they do not truly understand what is right for me. My deep-seated knowing is mine alone, and cannot be taken from me. This is my life, and my dharma, mission, or calling is to love and to do no harm."

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I am always looking for good, personal GMC, covid and childhood vaccination stories.

You can write to me privately: unbekoming@outlook.com

If you are Covid vaccine injured, consider the FLCCC Post-Vaccine Treatment

If you want to understand and “see” what baseline human health looks like, watch (and share) this 21 minutes

If you want to help someone, give them a book. Official Stories by Liam Scheff. Point them to a “safe” chapter (here and here), and they will find their way to vaccination.

Here are all the Book Summaries produced so far:

FREE Book Summary: The HPV Vaccine on Trial by Holland et al.

FREE Book Summary: Bitten by Kris Newby (Lyme Disease)

FREE Book Summary: The Great Cholesterol Con by Dr Malcolm Kendrick

FREE Book Summary: Propaganda by Edward Bernays

FREE Book Summary: Toxic Legacy by Stephanie Seneff (Glyphosate)

FREE Book Summary: The Measles Book by CHD

FREE Book Summary: The Deep Hot Biosphere by Thomas Gold (Abiogenic Oil)

FREE Book Summary: The Peanut Allergy Epidemic by Heather Fraser

FREE eBook: What is a woman? - “We don’t know yet.”

FREE eBook: The Climate™

FREE eBook: A letter to my two adult kids - Vaccines and the free spike protein