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Factscinator's avatar

🍺NUDGE-NUDGE-WINK-WINK😉😉

Scene: A dimly lit pub in Britain 🇬🇧. Mr. Wise to… is seated next to Mr. ViroLiegist, who is nervously supping a pint of warm beer. 🍻 Mr. Wise to…, grinning mischievously 😏 leans over.

Mr. Wise to… [Leaning in] “Ello, mate. You, er, work in ‘virology,’ do you?"🧪👨‍🔬

Mr. ViroLiegist [In a haughty, upper-class accent] “Yes, that’s right.” 😐

Mr. Wise to… [Nods eagerly, twiddling his thumbs 👍]

“Ahhhh, virology, eh? Very important field, eh? 😉 [Winks] Isolate any ‘viruses’ recently? 🤔 [Leans in closer] You know… isolate isolate, wink wink, nudge nudge?” 😏👈

Mr. ViroLiegist: “Well, we don’t really… isolate in the strictest sense.” 😬

Mr. Wise to… [Nods knowingly 🤨] “Oh, don’t you now, eh? Don’t really isolate, wink wink, say no more! 😎

So, uh, you get your little culture dish 🧫 and—what—throw in some monkey kidney cells, eh? 🐒 Give it a little stir, nudge nudge?” 🥄😉

Mr. ViroLiegist: “Well, yes, we introduce cell cultures—” 🧬

Mr. Wise to… “Introduce, eh? 😏 [Winks dramatically] I’ll bet you do! Eh? 👀 [Leans in close, eyes wide] Cytopathic effects, eh? Lovely bit of destruction 🔥 wink wink, say no more!” 🧨

Mr. ViroLiegist: “Well, yes, it’s just part of the process…” 😓

Mr. Wise to… [Interrupts, grinning 😁] “Part of the process, eh? Process, eh? Mixing and matching 🧪 bit of this, bit of that – eh? All gets a bit complicated, don’t it? 🤯 [Leans back, crossing his arms smugly 😌] I bet there’s PCR involved, eh? Eh? 📈 Amplifying things that aren’t really, you know – wink wink, say no more!” 🤫

Mr. ViroLiegist: “We use PCR to—” 🧫🧬

Mr. Wise to… [Leans forward, raising his eyebrows repeatedly 👀👀👀]

“Ohhh, I bet you do! PCR – right between the old ’genes’, eh? 🧬 Amplify this, amplify that – nudge nudge, lovely bit of sequences, eh?” 🧵📊

Mr. ViroLiegist [Awkwardly]... “Well, it’s to detect—” 😓

Mr. Wise to… “Detect, eh? 🧐 [Grinning wider 😄] Oh, I bet you detect all sorts of things! Bits of ‘RNA’ floating about in the old soup 🍜 eh? No need for anything pure, eh? Just a bit of random genetic detritus, eh? You sly dog, you!” 🐶💥

Mr. ViroLiegist: “Well, it’s not quite that simple—” 😐

Mr. Wise to… [Nudges him 😉]

“Not that simple, eh? Say no more! No need to complicate things, right? 🧠 Just throw in some random sequences, patch ’em together 🧩 bit of guesswork, eh? Lovely bit of data stitching – wink wink! 🪡📉

[Leans in] You ever, uh, publish any of that? Eh? Eh? Get a cheeky little grant for your trouble?” 💸📄

Mr. ViroLiegist [Hesitating]

“Well, I mean, we—” 😳

Mr. Wise to… [Nods eagerly 😏]

“Ohhhh, I bet you did, eh? Got your cheeky little funding, eh? 🤑 [Elbows him harder] Lots of papers written 📝 all about nothing in particular – eh? Just a bit of this, a bit of that – wink wink, nudge nudge! 😎

And all without really having seen the little blighter, eh?” 🔬❓👻

Mr. ViroLiegist [Sputtering on his warm pint 🍺]

“Well, we have electron microscope images—” 📷

Mr. Wise to… “Ohhh, electron microscopes, eh? 🧫🔍 [Winks again, jabbing him with his elbow 🫳😏] Big ol’ blurry blobs, eh? Slap a few arrows on there, call it a virus, eh? 🟢🔴➡️ Lovely bit of science, that! [Sits back, smug 😌] Can’t argue with that now, can you? Science at its finest, eh? Say no more!” 🎓😂

Mr. ViroLiegist [Confused 😵]

“I—”

Mr. Wise to… [Leaning back in satisfaction 😎]

“Ohhhh, you’re a sly one, mate. Absolutely love it! Nudge nudge, wink wink!” 😁😉

📽️ [Fade out, as Mr. Wise to… smirks knowingly 😏 and Mr. ViroLiegist squirms uncomfortably 🥴]

Allen's avatar

Virologists operate on the level of ancient superstitions. Snatching at imaginary dybbuk's that can only be seen through the lens of super techno-marvel machines that are pre-programmed to point towards motes and mites as evidence of the haunting. Perpetuating this primitive superstition that submicroscopic invisible particles floating through the air make people sick requires loads of jargon, increasingly obscure language to mystify the quackery.

Not to mention non-stop multi-billion dollar propaganda campaigns and legions of hired priests in white robes who claim the mantle of "science" to hoodwink the unsuspecting public.

Pretty amazing to think people believe this voodoo garbage. Excellent means of social control.

And then they create magical elixirs (that in a sane world would be understood for what they are (industrial poisons) that allegedly exorcise these submicroscopic demons from the mortal body.

Makes for a good show and big business, but has nothing to do with biological reality. It's rather fitting that the pinnacle of the dangerous religious cults of virology and vaccinology is the malignant belief that injecting synthetic chemicals made by habitually criminal companies that profit from perpetual disease somehow produces health.

Germ theory and gene theory are both reductionist, primitive superstitions that only remain viable due to massive propaganda and massive funding from the ruling interests that birthed and benefit from them at the expense of humanity.

Both are important to the ruling class criminals as they provide cover in countless ways for the brutal operations that they profit from.

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