Department of Emerging and Never-Proven-to-Exist Pathogenic Microbes
Are you tired of adhering to the scientific method?
Do you look at a normal bodily detox response and think, “We could monetize that”? 🤔💰
Then we want YOU. 🧪✨
Our rapidly expanding institution seeks a Disease Invention Specialist to join an elite team dedicated to transforming inconvenient biological realities into billion-dollar product lines. 📈💉
✨ Key Responsibilities
🧫 Identify ordinary bodily responses — sweating, coughing, sneezing, vomiting, diarrhea — and officially designate them as brand-new infectious diseases.
🦠 Attribute these exciting new diseases to microscopic pathogens that remain frustratingly difficult to isolate, purify, or otherwise demonstrate under properly controlled conditions. Don’t worry — we have a PCR test for that. 🔬
💉 Develop innovative harmaceutical products designed to prevent the disease that was just invented. Bonus points if the product itself produces symptoms similar to the disease it claims to prevent. 📊
🤝 Assist in the regulatory approval process by working closely with committees filled with individuals who have purely coincidental financial relationships with manufacturers.
👶 Expand the childhood schedule whenever possible. Our long-term strategic vision is simple: if it moves, inject it. If it doesn’t move yet, inject it earlier.
✨ Ideal Candidate
🧠 Demonstrates exceptional talent for reinterpreting detoxification symptoms as viral attacks.
📊 Comfortable using diagnostic tools that detect “genetic” fragments of uncertain origin and presenting the results with absolute certainty.
🎤 Fluent in phrases such as “safe and effective,” “rare side effects,” and “trust the science.”
🎭 Possesses the creative imagination required to construct compelling pathogen narratives without the inconvenience of demonstrating the pathogen as an independent causal agent.
🙈 Skilled at ignoring irrelevant environmental distractions such as contaminated water, malnutrition, toxic exposures, or disrupted gut ecology. Those topics belong to other departments.
✨ Compensation & Benefits
💰 Competitive salary plus generous consulting opportunities from companies producing the products you recommend.
🏛️ Invitations to prestigious advisory panels where policy decisions and personal financial outcomes align beautifully.
⚖️ Participation in our Product Liability Protection Program, ensuring that any unfortunate outcomes remain someone else’s problem.
👶📈 Access to the world’s largest captive market: newborn infants who cannot read packet inserts, question diagnoses, or file adverse event reports.
✨ About Us
🏭 Our department has a proud tradition of innovation. Over the past six decades we have successfully expanded the childhood schedule from a modest handful of injections to dozens of doses before kindergarten.
💡 Our philosophy is simple: with enough creativity, any symptom can become a disease and any disease can become a product.
And remember…
If the body tries to eliminate toxins through vomiting or diarrhea, that’s not detoxification.
That’s a brand-new revenue stream waiting to be named. 💰🦠✨
Start Date
Immediate. The next pandemic narrative won’t write itself. 🦠📝
As ever, another brilliant and urgently-needed article. Thank you, Unbekoming!
Below are 2 related articles I have written. The first listed is from 10/25, in which I give Trump, Kennedy, and MAHA leaders an “F” grade for ending the vaccine devastation and restoring individual and parental rights with regard to healthcare/medical decision making.
The second is from 7/25. It is a simple, common-sense, 7-point plan on how to end the vaccine devastation and restore our God-given, Constitutionally-guaranteed rights of bodily sovereignty and parental rights.
A symptom is a manifestation of dis-ease. Suppressing the symptom does not cure the disequilibrium. Vaccines are given when there are no symptoms, and are one causative factor of dis-ease. Babies can't articulate other than crying their suffering, their parents can speak up, but most have been captured. The most difficult time to go against pharma is in a crisis.
I received this in today's notification from Family Medicine SmartBrief:
Simultaneous vaccinations may not raise reaction risk
(Karl Tapales/Getty Images)
Research presented at the annual meeting of the American Academy of Allergy, Asthma and Immunology found that administering multiple vaccines simultaneously to children ages 2 to 18 months did not increase the risk of adverse reactions, compared with administering a six-valent vaccine alone. "The simultaneous administration of vaccines against different pathogens during one visit to a medical facility is safe and contributes to maintaining optimal clinical benefits with maximum protection of the child," said researcher Anastasiia Bondarenko.
This is a question. This article says that among the vaccines administered to infants all at once at the 2 month point, is Hep-B. It is my understanding that Hep-B is given in the first 24 hours of life. Is the one given at the 2 month mark a second dose?
Yes, the first one is given within 12 hrs,of birth, the second at 2 months, the third at six month. A blood test for antibodies is done two months later...and a booster given if titre not high enough. Russian Roulette for infants and children 100%!!!
Thank you, Dr Cowan, for sharing the anonymous writer's simple explanation of the "science" of "the immune system" and "germ theory" which apparently is based on total bs. Love the education on the "theory of evolution" with your sense of humor and sarcasm too.
🚨 NOW HIRING 🚨
Disease Invention Specialist
Department of Emerging and Never-Proven-to-Exist Pathogenic Microbes
Are you tired of adhering to the scientific method?
Do you look at a normal bodily detox response and think, “We could monetize that”? 🤔💰
Then we want YOU. 🧪✨
Our rapidly expanding institution seeks a Disease Invention Specialist to join an elite team dedicated to transforming inconvenient biological realities into billion-dollar product lines. 📈💉
✨ Key Responsibilities
🧫 Identify ordinary bodily responses — sweating, coughing, sneezing, vomiting, diarrhea — and officially designate them as brand-new infectious diseases.
🦠 Attribute these exciting new diseases to microscopic pathogens that remain frustratingly difficult to isolate, purify, or otherwise demonstrate under properly controlled conditions. Don’t worry — we have a PCR test for that. 🔬
💉 Develop innovative harmaceutical products designed to prevent the disease that was just invented. Bonus points if the product itself produces symptoms similar to the disease it claims to prevent. 📊
🤝 Assist in the regulatory approval process by working closely with committees filled with individuals who have purely coincidental financial relationships with manufacturers.
👶 Expand the childhood schedule whenever possible. Our long-term strategic vision is simple: if it moves, inject it. If it doesn’t move yet, inject it earlier.
✨ Ideal Candidate
🧠 Demonstrates exceptional talent for reinterpreting detoxification symptoms as viral attacks.
📊 Comfortable using diagnostic tools that detect “genetic” fragments of uncertain origin and presenting the results with absolute certainty.
🎤 Fluent in phrases such as “safe and effective,” “rare side effects,” and “trust the science.”
🎭 Possesses the creative imagination required to construct compelling pathogen narratives without the inconvenience of demonstrating the pathogen as an independent causal agent.
🙈 Skilled at ignoring irrelevant environmental distractions such as contaminated water, malnutrition, toxic exposures, or disrupted gut ecology. Those topics belong to other departments.
✨ Compensation & Benefits
💰 Competitive salary plus generous consulting opportunities from companies producing the products you recommend.
🏛️ Invitations to prestigious advisory panels where policy decisions and personal financial outcomes align beautifully.
⚖️ Participation in our Product Liability Protection Program, ensuring that any unfortunate outcomes remain someone else’s problem.
👶📈 Access to the world’s largest captive market: newborn infants who cannot read packet inserts, question diagnoses, or file adverse event reports.
✨ About Us
🏭 Our department has a proud tradition of innovation. Over the past six decades we have successfully expanded the childhood schedule from a modest handful of injections to dozens of doses before kindergarten.
💡 Our philosophy is simple: with enough creativity, any symptom can become a disease and any disease can become a product.
And remember…
If the body tries to eliminate toxins through vomiting or diarrhea, that’s not detoxification.
That’s a brand-new revenue stream waiting to be named. 💰🦠✨
Start Date
Immediate. The next pandemic narrative won’t write itself. 🦠📝
Brilliant
👍👍 MASSIVE THANKS 🎉🕺
It's no wonder Dr. Tom is beloved by all the right folks and vilified by all the wrong folks.
As ever, another brilliant and urgently-needed article. Thank you, Unbekoming!
Below are 2 related articles I have written. The first listed is from 10/25, in which I give Trump, Kennedy, and MAHA leaders an “F” grade for ending the vaccine devastation and restoring individual and parental rights with regard to healthcare/medical decision making.
https://ageofautism.com/maha-report-card-for-vaccines-and-rights/
The second is from 7/25. It is a simple, common-sense, 7-point plan on how to end the vaccine devastation and restore our God-given, Constitutionally-guaranteed rights of bodily sovereignty and parental rights.
https://ageofautism.com/csp-for-rfk-jr/
A symptom is a manifestation of dis-ease. Suppressing the symptom does not cure the disequilibrium. Vaccines are given when there are no symptoms, and are one causative factor of dis-ease. Babies can't articulate other than crying their suffering, their parents can speak up, but most have been captured. The most difficult time to go against pharma is in a crisis.
I received this in today's notification from Family Medicine SmartBrief:
Simultaneous vaccinations may not raise reaction risk
(Karl Tapales/Getty Images)
Research presented at the annual meeting of the American Academy of Allergy, Asthma and Immunology found that administering multiple vaccines simultaneously to children ages 2 to 18 months did not increase the risk of adverse reactions, compared with administering a six-valent vaccine alone. "The simultaneous administration of vaccines against different pathogens during one visit to a medical facility is safe and contributes to maintaining optimal clinical benefits with maximum protection of the child," said researcher Anastasiia Bondarenko.
Full Story: Medscape (3/6)
https://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/giving-multiple-vaccines-once-not-linked-additional-risk-2026a10006x6
This is the information going directly to the physicians.
Ahhh...the fox guarding the hen house once again...
This is a question. This article says that among the vaccines administered to infants all at once at the 2 month point, is Hep-B. It is my understanding that Hep-B is given in the first 24 hours of life. Is the one given at the 2 month mark a second dose?
Yes, the first one is given within 12 hrs,of birth, the second at 2 months, the third at six month. A blood test for antibodies is done two months later...and a booster given if titre not high enough. Russian Roulette for infants and children 100%!!!
Thank you, Dr Cowan, for sharing the anonymous writer's simple explanation of the "science" of "the immune system" and "germ theory" which apparently is based on total bs. Love the education on the "theory of evolution" with your sense of humor and sarcasm too.
Does Mark Gober use the Dr title?